Catching Up Reax (Weeks 9-11)

It's time to catch up on some action from the past few weeks, after D99 got caught up chillin with a homeboy lieutenant who came through town. Weeks 9, 10, and 11 are concluded, and the hike to the top of Everest has just reached high altitude base camp. After a close victory over DESTROY JEW BREES and a set back in week 10, Unseen's crew stand poised like expert sherpas ready to guide D99 to the summit. So take your equipment back to the store, Unseen don't wanna hear that weak shit no more.

In regard to the week 9 win,  D99 was pushed to the limit on the Eagles v. Saints Monday Night Football game, all the way down to the last minute. In retrospect, the turning point in the matchup literally hinged upon three plays in the 1st half:

• With Pierre Thomas in DESTROY's lineup, 1st-10 on the Eagles' 10, Brees handed off to Thomas who took it 9 yards and was poised to break the plane for 6 on some nail-in-the-coffin type shit until the Eagles David Sims literally pulled him backward and down at the 1 as Unseen yelled "stop that boy!" at the TV.

Oh so close...

• On the very next play, the Saints ran play action and Brees connected with Colston (who used the referee to find separation from Asomugha) for the 1 yd score. -6 for DESTROY JEW BREES. +6 for D99.
• Lastly, after a beautiful completion dropped into Colston (covered tightly again by Asomugha) to bring N.O. to the Phi 17, Brees fumbled during a sack by the Eagles Brandon Graham, resulting in -2 for DESTROY and giving enough padding to maintain the lead for the win.

All in all, it was a well scripted victory, adding a bit of sting to the bite inflicted upon the then 1st place team, putting the motherfucker in check and clearing the way for D99 to step on up. Why you fools wanna battle with kids with steel tongues? Butt Munchers appears to be hell bent on throwing banana peels in the street trying to slip up the King cruisin on his chopper. No matter. This salad tossin hoe is only prolonging the inevitable- Unseen remains steady crafting bars like jewels to bring to the market and strike it rich with the hardware.

Meanwhile, league standings have been mixing and shuffling and 7 teams remain in the hunt for playoff positions. Jew Brees is back in this bitch- after being matched up for the 2nd time with his arch-rival, he avenged his earlier loss and pressed him flatter than a piece of matzo. Amazingly, autoplay muddogs sits above .500 after stealing a win from Nemisis, a 7-4 squad tied up with DESTROY JEW BREES. D99 got another chance to sucker-punch suckadickasaurus, who actually bothered to update his lineup but still lost by a measly 3 points. The field is now more crowded than clowns in a volkswagen.

It's time to spit some truth to yal space monkeys now that the trade deadline has passed. For three solid weeks, Unseen put up Adrian Peterson and Dwayne Bowe for DESTROY JEW BREES' Peyton Manning and Brandon Marshall. This trade would have resulted in an positive +28 points for DESTROY compared with the +4 points for D99, and DESTROY still didn't have the sense to realize that having Manning on his bench while he is rolling with rbs like Pierre Thomas and Felix Jones (limited shelf life there homie) will not help his cause. What is perhaps most interesting about this situation is the fact that dude didn't even have the balls to respond to the offer. Denying a trade is one thing. Acting like you don't see it altogether is quite another. Look, we know Unseen is on some alpha dog running-the-pack type shit, but where is your manhood yo?

Who snatched that shit?

To begin, the pickup of Peterson alone makes it worth it- especially given the fact that he is on pace for his best season ever.  Secondly, given the shape of your team, you cannot (actually, fuck that- WILL NOT) win a league by denying other teams points through keeping players on your bench. Look, you're simply not in a position to make a call like that given your lack of talent at the most important position in fantasy. AP has the ability to carry your output for BOTH slots on a weekly basis. But you didn't even think about this. If nothing else -really- this was your opportunity to stick it to D99 with a stamp of "denied" and a chance to lay some vicious words into the cut. Instead, let it be known to the world:
 

You did nothing.

Unseen faces off against Stealers Rule this week and stands a good chance to lay a few head shots on the competition and solidify his playoff position- he's already kicking back and enjoying some victory L's and brews. Jew Brees has a tough matchup with Butt Munchers, who has some favorable plays with Doug Martin (ATL at home), C.J. Spiller (at Indy), and Brady at a Revis-less Jets. Sucka pairs against a surging Larry Turner, who looks to be in good shape as long as he plays Dez Bryant over a benched Titus Young, and inserts Minnesota's D off the bye (against a weak Chicago offense) for the Giants D against Green Bay. Nemisis1 might as well be on the bye this week, as he faces empty shell under dogs (autowin kthx), and DESTROY JEW BREES takes on a Gronkowski-less muddogs...both are sure to enjoy their Thanksgiving feasts. Get it while you can.

Until next week bitches.